Everything they thought to be true would be rocked.
A woman opens up about her másturbation sessions shares some myths men believe about másturbation.
1. We stick anything and everything in our váginas. I once had a guy pick up a sculpture of the Eiffel Tower I have on my bóokshelf and ask me if I ever stuck it in my vágina. “Are you kidding me?” I asked. He replied, “If I were a woman, I would be sticking stuff in my vágina constantly.” This activated my gérmophobia beyond belief. All I could think about was what kind of crazy yeast ínfection I would get if I put that thing in my vág. If I put anything in my vágina — a fingér, a víbrator, a pénis — I am extremely concerned with it’s cléanliness.
2. We always do it náked or in séxy lingerie. Men like the way I look náked, I know, but that doesn’t mean I get off on myself. I like my body, but I don’t stríp down or put on língerie to pleasure myself, at least not when díddling alone. I usually have my PJs on considering I tend to get business done before bed to help me fall asleep or when I wake up to help me get my áss up. I’m way too tired, lazy, or un-self-obsessed to take my clóthes óff.
3. That the mere sight of a d**k gets us off. I love d**ks for sucking, for f**king, for fondling. But I don’t look at d**ks when I másturbate, I usually think of the person attached to the pénis or the act associated with it. A disembodied d**k is not the least bit séxy to me. Másturbation, for me, always starts with an erotic thought, not a phantom pénis.
4. We másturbate with our girlfriends. This idea kills me. Would I ever call my girlfriends up when I’m hórny and ask them to come over for a diddlé party? Hell no! Even if I were a lesbian, that wouldn’t happen. Másturbation is private unless I’m doing it in front of a séx partner for fun.
5. We fóndle our bóobs while we másturbate. Maybe there are some woman out there who fondle their títs when they touch themselves. But I never have. I am just concentrating on getting the job done. Touching my own boóbs doesn’t even remotely excíte me.
6. We need to másturbate every day. Our séx drives vary, lady to lady, and depending on phases in our lives. Personally, I’ve gone through periods of time where I do másturbate every day, or even several times a day. I’ve also gone through complete fondling droughts where I wasn’t into díddling myself for weeks. My self-pleasure drive is usually connected to my mental state or my hórmones. I get hórnier when I’m óvulating and when I have my period. My séx drive plumméts when I’m going through any kind of stressful life event.
7. We másturbate looking at pictures/pórn of hot guys or hot girls. I know a few women who look at pórn when they másturbate. Not me. It’s all in my head. I draw on past séxy experiences or fantasies when I’m doing it. I do look at pórn, but not while I’m másturbating. It will turn me on, then I’ll másturbate, usually thinking about something else.
8. We like to look at ourselves in the mirror or stand in front of windows while we do it. A guy once asked me if I másturbated in front of my living room window. I found this to be the most amusing question ever. I realize it was just because he wished he would walk by a window and find a woman másturbating. But no. Never. Watching myself or inviting some random person on the street to watch me does not turn me on. At all.
9. We stick our fingérs inside of us. Some of us do, of course, but some of us use vibes or other toys. Some of us just rub something against our clit and never put anything inside. Some of us húmp stuff. It depends what mood I’m in or how much energy I have. My fingérnails are too sharp for a lot of fingér action. I think I would lacérate my labía. No thanks
10. We think it’s really hot to másturbate in the showér. Men probably believe this because THEY másturbate in the showér. Actually, standing up is not an awesome position for me. I do have a showér head that I’ve aimed at my vágina before. I was like, Oh, there’s water shooting at my vágina. OK. Then I continued on with my showér. That was it.
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